I don't really recall why I made this table; some random conversation on G+ I would guess. Anyway, posting it here so it doesn't get lost in the doom that came to G+. Simply roll d100 three times to generate an appropriately colourful insult for your favorite D&D-ish game. Or real life; who am I to tell you what to do?
Shakespearean Insult Kit
1-2
|
artless
|
base-court
|
apple-john
|
3-4
|
bawdy
|
bat-fowling
|
baggage
|
5-6
|
beslubbering
|
beef-witted
|
barnacle
|
7-8
|
bootless
|
beetle-headed
|
bladder
|
9-10
|
churlish
|
boil-brained
|
boar-pig
|
11-12
|
cockered
|
clapper-clawed
|
bugbear
|
13-14
|
clouted
|
clay-brained
|
bum-bailey
|
15-16
|
craven
|
common-kissing
|
canker-blossom
|
17-18
|
currish
|
crook-pated
|
clack-dish
|
19-20
|
dankish
|
dismal-dreaming
|
clotpole
|
21-22
|
dissembling
|
dizzy-eyed
|
coxcomb
|
23-24
|
droning
|
doghearted
|
codpiece
|
25-26
|
errant
|
dread-bolted
|
death-token
|
27-28
|
fawning
|
earth-vexing
|
dewberry
|
29-30
|
fobbing
|
elf-skinned
|
flap-dragon
|
31-32
|
froward
|
fat-kidneyed
|
flax-wench
|
33-34
|
frothy
|
fen-sucked
|
flirt-gill
|
35-36
|
gleeking
|
flap-mouthed
|
foot-licker
|
37-38
|
goatish
|
fly-bitten
|
fustilarian
|
39-40
|
gorbellied
|
folly-fallen
|
giglet
|
41-42
|
impertinent
|
fool-born
|
gudgeon
|
43-44
|
infectious
|
full-gorged
|
haggard
|
45-46
|
jarring
|
guts-griping
|
harpy
|
47-48
|
loggerheaded
|
half-faced
|
hedge-pig
|
49-50
|
lumpish
|
hasty-witted
|
horn-beast
|
51-52
|
mammering
|
hedge-born
|
hugger-mugger
|
53-54
|
mangled
|
hell-hated
|
joithead
|
55-56
|
mewling
|
idle-headed
|
lewdster
|
57-58
|
paunchy
|
ill-breeding
|
lout
|
59-60
|
pribbling
|
ill-nurtured
|
maggot-pie
|
61-62
|
puking
|
knotty-pated
|
malt-worm
|
63-64
|
puny
|
milk-livered
|
mammet
|
65-66
|
qualling
|
motley-minded
|
measle
|
67-68
|
rank
|
onion-eyed
|
minnow
|
69-70
|
reeky
|
plume-plucked
|
miscreant
|
71-72
|
roguish
|
pottle-deep
|
moldwarp
|
73-74
|
ruttish
|
pox-marked
|
mumble-news
|
75-76
|
saucy
|
reeling-ripe
|
nut-hook
|
77-78
|
spleeny
|
rough-hewn
|
pigeon-egg
|
79-80
|
spongy
|
rude-growing
|
pignut
|
81-82
|
surly
|
rump-fed
|
puttock
|
83-84
|
tottering
|
shard-borne
|
pumpion
|
85-86
|
unmuzzled
|
sheep-biting
|
ratsbane
|
87-88
|
vain
|
spur-galled
|
scut
|
89-90
|
venomed
|
swag-bellied
|
skainsmate
|
91-92
|
villainous
|
tardy-gaited
|
strumpet
|
93-94
|
warped
|
tickle-brained
|
varlot
|
95-96
|
wayward
|
toad-spotted
|
vassal
|
97-98
|
weedy
|
unchin-snouted
|
whey-face
|
99-00
|
yeasty
|
weather-bitten
|
wagtail
|
Original Source: http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/shake_rule.html
